The Closed Door that Opened My Eyes: Lessons Learned from Facebook Group Rejections

Sometimes you think focusing on an industry is the way to go and will help you focus your marketing. I know I’ve told some of you that and encouraged others to explore it. 

Recently I've learned that maybe that's not always the case.  

You need to know when it’s good to change directions and stop putting all of your eggs in one basket.  

I began pursuing one industry back in late November of 2021. Here’s a few of the things I tried: 

I wrote letters and mailed them to 50 business owners and called them to see if they got my note and wanted to have a conversation. I got close to getting a few new clients but it didn’t work. 

I asked multiple podcast and/or business coaches that worked in the industry if I could speak on their podcast or speak to their groups. I got some interest but nothing serious.  

One thing I thought was really clever and it was good advice for my virtual assistant was to join some industry Facebook groups. Only some would let me in, since I was in marketing, not their specific trade. Some of these groups don’t want outsiders or people selling, I totally get it. I started hopping into the groups and giving value to questions like “how to get more clients” or  “what to do for marketing.”  

It was really uncomfortable, I felt like I had to be super careful or they might kick me out. I would feel very nervous and stressed giving answers. I kept showing up in the groups, trying to connect and be useful and sticking to the rules - not sharing my website or DMing people, or offering my services. I did that for a few weeks. 

There was a Wednesday where I was able to help a lot of folks and share really great advice and got excited about connecting with people.  

And then I came back into the group a few days later. I wanted to check in and do some more activity. Something strange happened -  I couldn't get into the Facebook group. I tried different links - I tried using my phone app (which I never keep on my phone anymore) and NADA. 

Luckily, I made a few friends in this group and I reached out to them the same day and said, “Hey, can you get into the Facebook group?” One replied, “Oh, yes, I'm having trouble too.” I was like, Whew, it’s not just me. Maybe things are having technical difficulties, I’ll check back Monday.  

Monday rolls around and I still can’t get into that Facebook group. I asked another person in the group and they said “I can get into the group just fine”. Ok - there’s obviously a problem - why was I kicked out? Was my info too much for the admins? I simply wanted to know. I asked another person I knew if she could ask one of the admins to see why I was kicked out. Her answer, she was too afraid to do it for fear that she would get flagged as well.  

Well, you can imagine I felt a lot of feelings. I worry about being canceled a lot online and the worst happened. I got canceled from a FB group. 

I was angry, hurt, rejected, embarrassed. What did I do wrong? Was I really that big of a threat?  

Anyway, the moral of the story is we get rejected, but sometimes it’s for our own good. I DID NOT enjoy being in those Facebook groups. I don’t want to be in a place where at any moment, I could be canceled. It was a good thing that it happened and kind of cut me off early. I didn't waste a lot of time there, my intuition was already yelling at me, Get Out! (the stomach knots and worrying). I don't want to be in places where people think I'm a threat. I told one of my good marketing friends about this, and she laughed.  She's like “They are crazy to think you are a threat.”  That helped me feel a bit better.  

I know sharing this with you all helps too. Many of you know me and I’m a sensitive, kind person who loves helping people. There are times you will be rejected in business and it's hard. It gives you an opportunity to remap your course. It's humbling however it was really clarifying who I should be serving in my business and ok to change your marketing direction. 

Can you relate? Have you been canceled or rejected? Was it a gift in the end? I would love to hear it and know that I’m not alone!